Max's Biographies

Din arrived in Columbia, South Carolina one rainy night when stumbled by a Target. Having no place to stay he took refuge in the warm walls of the cleaner alternative to Wal-Mart. It was here, in a Target in Columbia, South Carolina that Mr. Mostall's life would be changed. Passing through the aisles he saw a computer game, Battlefield 1942. Din bought this great game with his last 50 dollars. As he walked out of the store a limo stopped by him. It was Mr Hugo Weaving who was in The Lord of The Rings movies. Hugo mentioned how much he loved BF1942, and that any person who liked it was a friend of his. Din was invited into the lavish limo. Through much generousity, Hugo gave Din a brand new computer to play his new game BF1942.

After many weeks using his new computer in the homeless shelter, Din realized he had a talent. He was excellent at BF1942. He'd fly and tank and shoot with grace and style.

It was then that he found his calling ladies and gentlemen, Din Mostall became the #1 ranked player in all of BF1942. Nike offered him contracts, EA wanted him to playtest, CAL invited him to every tournament. Din took all these offers and eventuallly became a millionaire. He returned to Charlotte ten years later, finding his father and mother still working hard.

Today Hugo Weaving World is the greatest theme park based on an actor ever, better than Dollywood. So to this boy who rose up through the ranks of BF1942 with grace and cunning, I salute you.

1. I like the Sonic the Hedgehog series
2. I like to ski
3. I also love Lord of the Rings
Who knew that one day a simple accident would make the world's greatest villain ever, ladies and gentlemen, I give you the biography of Burning Hammer.

It was a normal day at the Home Depot in New Orleans, Louisiana. Craig McGreg was doing his job as a stockboy in the back of large warehouse. Sorting through the inventory he grabbed a box of hammers and placed them on a shelf high above the floor. Next he went to sort the nuclear material, yes Home Depot has nuclear material. But while doing his job fantastically just like any hard working class guy did, a horrible tradgedy happened. The box of hammers he had just placed before fell knocking over the barrels of nuclear material. Craig was covered in nuclear hammer waste. He quickly ran to get cleaned up and went along with his business.

For the next 5 years things went great for the young man from New Orleans, he attended Crawfish High School and was starting quarterback. His parents Ed and Betsy couldn't have been more proud of their son.

High School graduation quickly came for young Craig and as he stepped up to get his diploma, something amazing occured. Craig began to burn bright green, and he found hammers appeared in his hands. Now to most of us this would be kickass, but Craig was terrified. Trying to get rid of the hammers he threw them only to have more appear in his hands. Craig screamed and ran out of his high school gym. He was shunned by his family and by his city.

Craig vowed revenge on Home Depot, with his new powers he couldn't enjoy the Lord of The Rings novels and movies or play his favorite game Sonic the Hedgehog. Craig decided to shed his identity and embrace his powers. These powers though would be the downfall of Louisiana.

On May 3rd, 2003 Craig returned to his hometown not as Craig McGreg, but as Burning Hammer. He destroyed the city quickly with his radioactive hammers. The Superdome was established as his new home and he had it remodeled into a recreation of Helm's Deep.

Burning Hammer still reigns over Louisiana as we speak but the government is powerless to stop his awesome power. This my friends is how the most powerful man in Louisiana rose to power. A tragic story.

Benno was born into a small Hispanic family in South Central, Los Angeles. Life was rough growing up for Benno, food was scarce and drugs were a plenty. Young Benno found refuge in the video game Medal of Honor Allied Assault. Escaping into WW2 helped him forget about the drug war raging around him.

At age 19 Benno's father was shot in a drive-by by a drug dealer. Benno had not realized his father had pushed drugs to help his family which he loved dearly. Benno's father Tenno, lay in a coma in South Central Hospital.

Benno had had enough of the drug lords and gangs that were ruining his town. He decided that becoming a minister and making a youth movement against drugs would clean up his town. He then realized it's a lot easier just to kill the drug lords. By being sort of smart and nice Benno rose up the ranks in the drug world.

By age 30, Benno was THE cocaine peddler in SC LA. This was the time Benno realized. He called a meeting of every drug dealer and gang member in LA to his 7 story mansion. As the men gathered in his living room, Benno readied his M1 Garand, yes he was going old school on their asses.

With astounding accuracy and speed Benno proceeded to shoot every drug lord and gang member at the meeting. It only took him 15 minutes too. Benno had done it, he had cleaned up the city for his father.

1)I like Dance Dance Revolution
2)I like basketball
3)I like girls
Robots have always been fantastical, but dark11link, took robots to another level of the game ladies and gentlemen.

Dark11link was created in a small garage outside of Boston, Massachusettes. His creator, the great scientist Tokagawa Daisonzo, made him for three purposes. Dance Dance Revolution, Basketball, and getting along with the ladies. Mr Daisonzo had always been bad at these three things and teased for it so he made this robot to show that a mere human couldn't be good at all three. His collegues mocked him and Dark11link's emotion chip felt great grief for his master.

July 7, 1997, this was the day of the first DDR dance for Dark11link. Stepping up to the machine infront of an astonished arcade he put in his quarters. Daisonzo sat in the back watching his great creation. The game started, and Dark11link proceeded to deliver the most amazing DDR playtime anyone had ever witnessed. He AAA'd every single song that the machine could pump out. One young kid thought he might try and duel Dark11link at DDR. The poor fellow went down with a broken leg trying to duplicate Dark11link's signature triple leg twist side bar holding somersault of robotics.

July 8, 1997 Mr. Daisonzo being very pleased with his perfect DDR playing robot arranged a meeting with Dr. J's basketball playing robot Slamatron 7800. Slamatron was a trash talking, ball jamming, spin slamming master of the hardwood. Dark11link just stood quietly and waited to begin. Slamatron 7800 quickly got a 45 point lead in the first three minutes of play, Mr. Daisonzo thinking Dark11link was broken went to make sure he was working. Dark11link proceeded to tell his master that he was giving Slamatron 7800 a .0000000001% of victory to fully test his comeback b'ballin skills. Slamatron went for his 47th point and Dark11link moved at the speed of sound towards the robot and blocked the shot. Infact he blocked the shot so hard that Slamatron went with the ball straight to the Earth's core. Slamatron was melted and had to forfeit.

July 9, 1997, this was the final test of Dark11link, his lady friend making skills. Dark11link walked into a popular club and released his good looking man hallucinogen into the air. He was pinned to the ground by 15 girls within seconds. Dark11link was a complete success!!!!!! Now it was time to prove his master right.

July 16, 1997, the world watched with anticipation to see if Dark11link would succeed at the ultimate test, he was to play DDR, basketball, and get women all at the same time. His opponent was Kobe Bryant, pre-rape controversy.

The test began with Dark11link beating every song on DDR with AAA scores, Kove Bryant amazingly wasn't even close to this accomplishment. 1 point went towards Dark11link. Next, was basketball, the ball was tipped off and Kobe Bryant tried to slam dunk only to have the ball stolen at supersonic speed and dunked in the other basket. Everytime Kobe touched the ball it disappeared and a point showed up for Dark11link. 2 points for Dark11link. The final test, the ladies. Dark11link quickly lured in a babe while Kobe Bryant was rejected after he offered to take the girl to Colorado.

1.I love to play handball
2.I was born in Phoenix, AZ
3.My nickname is Jebus
BiggestJ was born in Phoeniz, Arizona on a hot day. When he was born the doctors noticed something amazing. Somehow he had come out with a rubber ball in his hand. As soon as the umbilical cord was cut, J was on the the ground hitting it against the wall! The doctor sat there startled and yelled "Jebus". This name would stick with him for his whole life.

Jebus's Mom quickly realized kids as talented as him don't need to waste time with school and diaper training. She had his nursery walls covered in hardwood and let him loose, for hours and hours little Jebus would hit that ball back and forth, back and forth.

By age 5 news of Jebus was spreading through the handball ranks of America. Many of the players believe he was the savior of their sport. He would clean up the corrupt world of handball. News of this protege angered one man though, Constanza Rollblando, the pride of Spain and the world's greatest handball player. He was sick of hearing about Jebus and his Godlike handball gifts.

Jebus was approached by many companies for a contract, but his mom decided to go with the Nike of handball, Spalding. Only one other player was sponsored by Spalding and that was Constanza Rollblando.

Age 7 saw the start of Jebus's professional handball career. He plowed through the best of the best in Arizona, then Nevada, then Texas, then Oklahoma. Soon the entire handball culture in America was dominated by the little boy.

One year and 7000 victories later, Jebus would meet Constanza Rollblando in Madrid, Spain for the handball world title. The prize? 560000000000 dollars. As his mother watched from Phoenix, little 8 year old Jebus began his match with Constanza Rollblando. A grueling match it was too, every inch Jebus gained, Constanza gained back, until it was time for Jebus to rise to glory or fall from grace. The match point, Constanza served, Jebus hit, then Constanza, then Jebus, Constanza, Jebus, Constanza, Jebus. Constanza line up his shot and whiffed it. At age 8 years old Jebus was the World Champion of handball. Unfortunately Rollblando, so enraged threw the hard rubber ball right at Jebus's leg, breaking it in 45 places.

Today, 20 years later, Jebus resides in his home in Phoenix, Arizona. Still recuperating from his horrible injury. Neighbors say they still sometimes hear a rubber ball being bounced late at night.

1.Loves Tifa
2.Born in Texas
3.Loves Hilary Duff
thegta3guy's life started out simple enough. Born in Texas to a single mom, he had a normal childhood. He always seemed to be around women though in his life. Most of his friends growing up were women, and he seemed to understand them very well.

Time passed and thegta3guy started getting a reputation as a bit of a ladies man. By the time he got to college he was dating about half the school, all the girls knew he was too, but they didn't mind.

A friend one day recommended that thegta3guy play a game for Playstation 1 called Final Fantasy 7. He became engrossed in the game and grew a fine liking to Tifa Lockheart, a character in the game. While playing he noticed something, Tifa was not on his screen anymore. She had just vanished. He got up confused and realized he was looking at Tifa Lockheart, in real life. His lady skills had somehow broughther out of the game into his dorm. Needless to say he was overjoyed.

Thegta3guy set out to California and found Hilary Duff, they quickly fell in love and got to makin babies. the only problem was she was not of legal age. Thegta3guy was thrown in jail, which is where he resides today, all the while his love Hilary Duff is waiting for him.

Dyaran was born on Valentine's Day and raised in the city of brotherly love Philadelphia. Of course living in Philadelphia, Dyaran quickly grew fascinated with swords, as Philly is the second most popular city for swordfighting next to Paris, France. He had his parents enroll him in Master Hochi's Sword Fighting Academy of East Philadelphia. Here Dyaran showed a definite natural talent at stabbing people with sharp objects. Master Hochi took Dyaran on as an apprentice and taught him the many secrets of the blade.

On his 15th birthday, Dyaran Rurouni got up excited to have some cake, and go for his sword training lesson. Today though, there would be no lesson. As Dyaran arrived at Master Hochi's Sword Fighting Academy of East Philadelphia, he saw that the building was now all steel, and towered high into the sky. The sign on the building now read GigantiCorp Videogames.

As we all know now, GigantiCorp Videogames had been using the academy for free motion capture for the upcoming video game, Super Death Ninja Squad. With all the capture done the academy was closed and Master Hochi was found out to be the CEO of GigantiCorp.

Dyaran's life at only the age of 15, was over. His dream of being a master swordsman was crushed. Unlike many of us however, Dyaran said **** you to fate and decided to take down GigantiCorp and reopen the Academy so all the little childrean could become proficient at stabbing.

Dyaran left to train at Master Ming's Academy of Swordsmanship for West Philadelphia. For the next 3 years Dyaran trained and trained, determined to return swordsmanship to its former glory in East Philadelphia.

What followed was a 3 hour killfest of all things GigantiCorp by the young Dyaran. Ninja robots, Samurai zombies, Ninja zombies, and Samurai robots could not stop the man. He finally met his old master Hochi, at the top floor, some 500 stories up.

The two proceeded to duel using all of their sword skills. Dyaran found himself pinned against a ledge that would lead to a 500 story fall and CEO Master Hochi waiting infront of him blade drawn. Dyaran realized he could either die by Master Hochi's blade or take Hochi and himself down.

Thanks to Dyaran's heroic plunge from 500 stories up taking CEO Master Hochi with him. They both died, but swordsmanship in West Philadelphia was brought back to its prestige.

Born in the Marshall Islands, SpiritSummoner lived a simple island life. He was very clever and few kids could ever trick him. Even with the hurdle of being born on a tiny island Spirit still got his hands on tons of videogames. Playing them was his favorite past time.

When the local game store got a new shipment in Spirit was the first one there. He found a game that sounded interesting, Badminton & Chess Simulator '96. One of the worst selling games ever created in the United States, Spirit got a deal on it and quickly rushed home to play his new game.

Weeks turned into months turned into years and Spirit was still playing his Badminton & Chess Simulator '96. His parents decided that he should play the actual games for a change and he agreed. Spirit became active in The Marshall Islands League of Chess and Badminton. He was ranked top 5 in his country, although only 11 people were in the whole league.

Spirit wondered why no one enjoyed the games of Badminton and Chess, then one day he had an epiphany. Combine the the two greatest sports the world had ever seen. What came about was Badminhess. His new game quickly spread through the Marshall Islands like wildfire and soon he was raking in money from the tickets purchased to watch his new sport in action. The Badminhess League grew and grew in popularity until SpiritSummoner decided that the U.S. should enjoy the wonderful game.

Spirit took his great game to the U.S., where it bombed horribly after being featured on Spike TV. Viacom wanted to add in trampolines under the players and Spirit gave in after pressure. They told him everything is better with a trampoline, well Badminhess isn't better.

So defeated SpiritSummoner retired to his home in the Marshall Islands. The Badminhess League continues to spread through island countries no one remembers exist though like the Nicobar Islands and Mergui Archipelago. Almost 1,000 people now know about Badminhess and marketing has just started in Zanzibar.


				*Blank Space* *Max's Biographies*



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		A popular video games web site (we won't link to it here) has a message board that our very own Max frequently visits. Recently he promised to make a biography for anyone who posted three things about themselves. Here is the result.



		1. I love Battlefield 1942 2. I was born in Charlotte, NC 3. I love the Lord of the Rings Born in Charlotte, North Carolina, Din Mostall lead a quaint life. His father was a coal miner and his mother a stay at home mom. At age 8 Din realized that he should set out on his own and forge his own path in life. So on a dark December morning he bean walking towards South Carolina. He'd always heard that SC was the place of dreams, and he'd be damned if he didn't go see what it was about. Din arrived in Columbia, South Carolina one rainy night when stumbled by a Target. Having no place to stay he took refuge in the warm walls of the cleaner alternative to Wal-Mart. It was here, in a Target in Columbia, South Carolina that Mr. Mostall's life would be changed. Passing through the aisles he saw a computer game, Battlefield 1942. Din bought this great game with his last 50 dollars. As he walked out of the store a limo stopped by him. It was Mr Hugo Weaving who was in The Lord of The Rings movies. Hugo mentioned how much he loved BF1942, and that any person who liked it was a friend of his. Din was invited into the lavish limo. Through much generousity, Hugo gave Din a brand new computer to play his new game BF1942. After many weeks using his new computer in the homeless shelter, Din realized he had a talent. He was excellent at BF1942. He'd fly and tank and shoot with grace and style. It was then that he found his calling ladies and gentlemen, Din Mostall became the #1 ranked player in all of BF1942. Nike offered him contracts, EA wanted him to playtest, CAL invited him to every tournament. Din took all these offers and eventuallly became a millionaire. He returned to Charlotte ten years later, finding his father and mother still working hard. Well folks, Din bought the coal mine his dad worked in and built an amusement park devoted to the man who gave him his success, Mr. Hugo Weaving. Today Hugo Weaving World is the greatest theme park based on an actor ever, better than Dollywood. So to this boy who rose up through the ranks of BF1942 with grace and cunning, I salute you. 1. I like the Sonic the Hedgehog series 2. I like to ski 3. I also love Lord of the Rings Who knew that one day a simple accident would make the world's greatest villain ever, ladies and gentlemen, I give you the biography of Burning Hammer. It was a normal day at the Home Depot in New Orleans, Louisiana. Craig McGreg was doing his job as a stockboy in the back of large warehouse. Sorting through the inventory he grabbed a box of hammers and placed them on a shelf high above the floor. Next he went to sort the nuclear material, yes Home Depot has nuclear material. But while doing his job fantastically just like any hard working class guy did, a horrible tradgedy happened. The box of hammers he had just placed before fell knocking over the barrels of nuclear material. Craig was covered in nuclear hammer waste. He quickly ran to get cleaned up and went along with his business. For the next 5 years things went great for the young man from New Orleans, he attended Crawfish High School and was starting quarterback. His parents Ed and Betsy couldn't have been more proud of their son. High School graduation quickly came for young Craig and as he stepped up to get his diploma, something amazing occured. Craig began to burn bright green, and he found hammers appeared in his hands. Now to most of us this would be kickass, but Craig was terrified. Trying to get rid of the hammers he threw them only to have more appear in his hands. Craig screamed and ran out of his high school gym. He was shunned by his family and by his city. Craig vowed revenge on Home Depot, with his new powers he couldn't enjoy the Lord of The Rings novels and movies or play his favorite game Sonic the Hedgehog. Craig decided to shed his identity and embrace his powers. These powers though would be the downfall of Louisiana. On May 3rd, 2003 Craig returned to his hometown not as Craig McGreg, but as Burning Hammer. He destroyed the city quickly with his radioactive hammers. The Superdome was established as his new home and he had it remodeled into a recreation of Helm's Deep. Burning Hammer still reigns over Louisiana as we speak but the government is powerless to stop his awesome power. This my friends is how the most powerful man in Louisiana rose to power. A tragic story. 1.i was born in LA 2.i love MOHAA 3.i am sort of smart and nice. Now for the story of the man, the myth, the ledgend, Benno. Benno was born into a small Hispanic family in South Central, Los Angeles. Life was rough growing up for Benno, food was scarce and drugs were a plenty. Young Benno found refuge in the video game Medal of Honor Allied Assault. Escaping into WW2 helped him forget about the drug war raging around him. At age 19 Benno's father was shot in a drive-by by a drug dealer. Benno had not realized his father had pushed drugs to help his family which he loved dearly. Benno's father Tenno, lay in a coma in South Central Hospital. Benno had had enough of the drug lords and gangs that were ruining his town. He decided that becoming a minister and making a youth movement against drugs would clean up his town. He then realized it's a lot easier just to kill the drug lords. By being sort of smart and nice Benno rose up the ranks in the drug world. By age 30, Benno was THE cocaine peddler in SC LA. This was the time Benno realized. He called a meeting of every drug dealer and gang member in LA to his 7 story mansion. As the men gathered in his living room, Benno readied his M1 Garand, yes he was going old school on their asses. With astounding accuracy and speed Benno proceeded to shoot every drug lord and gang member at the meeting. It only took him 15 minutes too. Benno had done it, he had cleaned up the city for his father. Today Benno resides in South Central with his 3rd wife Laquisha and his 3 sons. Thanks to their dad, Benno's sons will never face the horrors that he did. Benno, proving that nice guys finish last, but sort of nice guys kill every drug lord in Los Angeles. 1)I like Dance Dance Revolution 2)I like basketball 3)I like girls Robots have always been fantastical, but dark11link, took robots to another level of the game ladies and gentlemen. Dark11link was created in a small garage outside of Boston, Massachusettes. His creator, the great scientist Tokagawa Daisonzo, made him for three purposes. Dance Dance Revolution, Basketball, and getting along with the ladies. Mr Daisonzo had always been bad at these three things and teased for it so he made this robot to show that a mere human couldn't be good at all three. His collegues mocked him and Dark11link's emotion chip felt great grief for his master. July 7, 1997, this was the day of the first DDR dance for Dark11link. Stepping up to the machine infront of an astonished arcade he put in his quarters. Daisonzo sat in the back watching his great creation. The game started, and Dark11link proceeded to deliver the most amazing DDR playtime anyone had ever witnessed. He AAA'd every single song that the machine could pump out. One young kid thought he might try and duel Dark11link at DDR. The poor fellow went down with a broken leg trying to duplicate Dark11link's signature triple leg twist side bar holding somersault of robotics. July 8, 1997 Mr. Daisonzo being very pleased with his perfect DDR playing robot arranged a meeting with Dr. J's basketball playing robot Slamatron 7800. Slamatron was a trash talking, ball jamming, spin slamming master of the hardwood. Dark11link just stood quietly and waited to begin. Slamatron 7800 quickly got a 45 point lead in the first three minutes of play, Mr. Daisonzo thinking Dark11link was broken went to make sure he was working. Dark11link proceeded to tell his master that he was giving Slamatron 7800 a .0000000001% of victory to fully test his comeback b'ballin skills. Slamatron went for his 47th point and Dark11link moved at the speed of sound towards the robot and blocked the shot. Infact he blocked the shot so hard that Slamatron went with the ball straight to the Earth's core. Slamatron was melted and had to forfeit. July 9, 1997, this was the final test of Dark11link, his lady friend making skills. Dark11link walked into a popular club and released his good looking man hallucinogen into the air. He was pinned to the ground by 15 girls within seconds. Dark11link was a complete success!!!!!! Now it was time to prove his master right. July 16, 1997, the world watched with anticipation to see if Dark11link would succeed at the ultimate test, he was to play DDR, basketball, and get women all at the same time. His opponent was Kobe Bryant, pre-rape controversy. This competition would prove Mr. Daisonzo right or wrong, could a human succeed in every way that his super robot could? The test began with Dark11link beating every song on DDR with AAA scores, Kove Bryant amazingly wasn't even close to this accomplishment. 1 point went towards Dark11link. Next, was basketball, the ball was tipped off and Kobe Bryant tried to slam dunk only to have the ball stolen at supersonic speed and dunked in the other basket. Everytime Kobe touched the ball it disappeared and a point showed up for Dark11link. 2 points for Dark11link. The final test, the ladies. Dark11link quickly lured in a babe while Kobe Bryant was rejected after he offered to take the girl to Colorado. Dark11link fulfilled his master's goal and today he lives a grand life in Grand Rapids, Michigan playing DDR, basketball and getting women. Dark11link, solid proof that with a metallic body and computer brain, anyone can excel at DDR, basketball, and women. 1.I love to play handball 2.I was born in Phoenix, AZ 3.My nickname is Jebus BiggestJ was born in Phoeniz, Arizona on a hot day. When he was born the doctors noticed something amazing. Somehow he had come out with a rubber ball in his hand. As soon as the umbilical cord was cut, J was on the the ground hitting it against the wall! The doctor sat there startled and yelled "Jebus". This name would stick with him for his whole life. Jebus's Mom quickly realized kids as talented as him don't need to waste time with school and diaper training. She had his nursery walls covered in hardwood and let him loose, for hours and hours little Jebus would hit that ball back and forth, back and forth. By age 5 news of Jebus was spreading through the handball ranks of America. Many of the players believe he was the savior of their sport. He would clean up the corrupt world of handball. News of this protege angered one man though, Constanza Rollblando, the pride of Spain and the world's greatest handball player. He was sick of hearing about Jebus and his Godlike handball gifts. Jebus was approached by many companies for a contract, but his mom decided to go with the Nike of handball, Spalding. Only one other player was sponsored by Spalding and that was Constanza Rollblando. Age 7 saw the start of Jebus's professional handball career. He plowed through the best of the best in Arizona, then Nevada, then Texas, then Oklahoma. Soon the entire handball culture in America was dominated by the little boy. One year and 7000 victories later, Jebus would meet Constanza Rollblando in Madrid, Spain for the handball world title. The prize? 560000000000 dollars. As his mother watched from Phoenix, little 8 year old Jebus began his match with Constanza Rollblando. A grueling match it was too, every inch Jebus gained, Constanza gained back, until it was time for Jebus to rise to glory or fall from grace. The match point, Constanza served, Jebus hit, then Constanza, then Jebus, Constanza, Jebus, Constanza, Jebus. Constanza line up his shot and whiffed it. At age 8 years old Jebus was the World Champion of handball. Unfortunately Rollblando, so enraged threw the hard rubber ball right at Jebus's leg, breaking it in 45 places. Today, 20 years later, Jebus resides in his home in Phoenix, Arizona. Still recuperating from his horrible injury. Neighbors say they still sometimes hear a rubber ball being bounced late at night. Whether playing handball or having a really cool nickname, Jebus will always be the champion of our hearts. 1.Loves Tifa 2.Born in Texas 3.Loves Hilary Duff thegta3guy's life started out simple enough. Born in Texas to a single mom, he had a normal childhood. He always seemed to be around women though in his life. Most of his friends growing up were women, and he seemed to understand them very well. Time passed and thegta3guy started getting a reputation as a bit of a ladies man. By the time he got to college he was dating about half the school, all the girls knew he was too, but they didn't mind. A friend one day recommended that thegta3guy play a game for Playstation 1 called Final Fantasy 7. He became engrossed in the game and grew a fine liking to Tifa Lockheart, a character in the game. While playing he noticed something, Tifa was not on his screen anymore. She had just vanished. He got up confused and realized he was looking at Tifa Lockheart, in real life. His lady skills had somehow broughther out of the game into his dorm. Needless to say he was overjoyed. Thegta3guy figured if he could get a videogame character to turn real with his charm he could surely get his crush, Hilary Duff to shack up with him. Thegta3guy set out to California and found Hilary Duff, they quickly fell in love and got to makin babies. the only problem was she was not of legal age. Thegta3guy was thrown in jail, which is where he resides today, all the while his love Hilary Duff is waiting for him. thegta3guy, a jailbird in love. 1. I wish I coulda been a swordsman 2. I work at a Video Game Store 3. Born on 2/14 Dreams do not always come true but for Dyaran Rurouni they did. Dyaran was born on Valentine's Day and raised in the city of brotherly love Philadelphia. Of course living in Philadelphia, Dyaran quickly grew fascinated with swords, as Philly is the second most popular city for swordfighting next to Paris, France. He had his parents enroll him in Master Hochi's Sword Fighting Academy of East Philadelphia. Here Dyaran showed a definite natural talent at stabbing people with sharp objects. Master Hochi took Dyaran on as an apprentice and taught him the many secrets of the blade. On his 15th birthday, Dyaran Rurouni got up excited to have some cake, and go for his sword training lesson. Today though, there would be no lesson. As Dyaran arrived at Master Hochi's Sword Fighting Academy of East Philadelphia, he saw that the building was now all steel, and towered high into the sky. The sign on the building now read GigantiCorp Videogames. As we all know now, GigantiCorp Videogames had been using the academy for free motion capture for the upcoming video game, Super Death Ninja Squad. With all the capture done the academy was closed and Master Hochi was found out to be the CEO of GigantiCorp. Dyaran's life at only the age of 15, was over. His dream of being a master swordsman was crushed. Unlike many of us however, Dyaran said **** you to fate and decided to take down GigantiCorp and reopen the Academy so all the little childrean could become proficient at stabbing. Dyaran left to train at Master Ming's Academy of Swordsmanship for West Philadelphia. For the next 3 years Dyaran trained and trained, determined to return swordsmanship to its former glory in East Philadelphia. On Valentine's Day, Dyaran's 19th birthday, he trekked through Philadelphia to the HQ of GiganitCorp Videogames. What followed was a 3 hour killfest of all things GigantiCorp by the young Dyaran. Ninja robots, Samurai zombies, Ninja zombies, and Samurai robots could not stop the man. He finally met his old master Hochi, at the top floor, some 500 stories up. The two proceeded to duel using all of their sword skills. Dyaran found himself pinned against a ledge that would lead to a 500 story fall and CEO Master Hochi waiting infront of him blade drawn. Dyaran realized he could either die by Master Hochi's blade or take Hochi and himself down. Thanks to Dyaran's heroic plunge from 500 stories up taking CEO Master Hochi with him. They both died, but swordsmanship in West Philadelphia was brought back to its prestige. Dyaran Rurouni, Master Swordsman and rejuvenator of West Philadelphia's Swordsmanship Legacy. 1. The only sport I liked was Badminton. And loves chess, only a chosen few can outsmart me. 2. Plays random games all day (with PC, PS2 and GBA), even with his GBA SP before sleeping. 3. I'm a little too cold to people, but not being mean to them. A sports legend and lover of video games the story of SpiritSummoner starts out like many others. Born in the Marshall Islands, SpiritSummoner lived a simple island life. He was very clever and few kids could ever trick him. Even with the hurdle of being born on a tiny island Spirit still got his hands on tons of videogames. Playing them was his favorite past time. When the local game store got a new shipment in Spirit was the first one there. He found a game that sounded interesting, Badminton & Chess Simulator '96. One of the worst selling games ever created in the United States, Spirit got a deal on it and quickly rushed home to play his new game. Weeks turned into months turned into years and Spirit was still playing his Badminton & Chess Simulator '96. His parents decided that he should play the actual games for a change and he agreed. Spirit became active in The Marshall Islands League of Chess and Badminton. He was ranked top 5 in his country, although only 11 people were in the whole league. Spirit wondered why no one enjoyed the games of Badminton and Chess, then one day he had an epiphany. Combine the the two greatest sports the world had ever seen. What came about was Badminhess. His new game quickly spread through the Marshall Islands like wildfire and soon he was raking in money from the tickets purchased to watch his new sport in action. The Badminhess League grew and grew in popularity until SpiritSummoner decided that the U.S. should enjoy the wonderful game. Spirit took his great game to the U.S., where it bombed horribly after being featured on Spike TV. Viacom wanted to add in trampolines under the players and Spirit gave in after pressure. They told him everything is better with a trampoline, well Badminhess isn't better. So defeated SpiritSummoner retired to his home in the Marshall Islands. The Badminhess League continues to spread through island countries no one remembers exist though like the Nicobar Islands and Mergui Archipelago. Almost 1,000 people now know about Badminhess and marketing has just started in Zanzibar. SpiritSummoner, inventor of the most popular sport in the Marshall Islands.



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